Thursday was the anniversary of my dad’s death. Last year, I wrote a post about it a few weeks after he died and always intended to write more, and though I’m not quite sure I’m ready, I don’t feel I can really let the anniversary go by without marking it.
So, on anniversaries. Taking time to do something special or to memorialize a person in some way seems important, but at the same time, it’s not as if I don’t think about him every day. What did happen was that as the day approached I started remembering everything that was going on last year and feeling a lot of anxiety – just remembering the events brought those emotions forward to the present. I think about how difficult his life was in the last few years, when he his body was working against him and he was struggling to find meaning in his life. I marvel at how strong my mom is. I also found it very difficult to talk about with people, but I miss him.
I guess that’s all I really have to say about it right now. The photo here is of my dad as a baby, with his parents, likely taken where they lived in Detroit, Michigan. This photo was probably taken around 1944. His parents were German immigrants who ran a grocery store. They both died before I was born. He had six older brothers and sisters, the youngest of which was 13 years older than him, and many of them have passed away.
* * *
I haven’t been post much for some time, and I’ve been thinking a lot about this blog and how to focus it and what I want it to be. I’m working on a lot of projects and hope to post about them here, soon, and to do more posts about things that I think are good or exciting. I am trying to resist the tendency for people to let Facebook take over their lives and become the dominant way that they share with people – in a kind of closed, in-crowd kind of way, managed and controlled by a corporation.
While I get things organized, you can check out what I’ve been doing with Aid & Abet – aside from helping groups with finance (which I actually like to do) – Aid & Abet is my main project at the moment, aside from trying to live my life in a fully engaged way that involves a lot of friends, books, traveling, and all that. We’ll be redesigning the website early in 2010, and of course, you’ll hear all about it here.